Naomi Tutu

On March 20, 2017, I went to hear Nontombi Naomi Tutu speak at the Nittany Lion Inn on Penn State University. Her speech, "Truth and Reconciliation: Healing the Wounds of Racism." This event was part of The Nelson Mandela Lecture Series, by the Africana Research Center at PSU.

Ms. Tutu is the third child of Archbishop Desmond Tutu and Nomalizo Leah Tutu. She was born in South Africa, lived in the United Kingdom and the United States, was educated in Swaziland, the US and England, and currently lives here in the states and divides that time with South Africa.

Growing up in the "battlefield" of South Africa has given Naomi many opportunities and challenges in her life. She has used these experiences to become an activist to raise her voice as a champion for the dignity of all. Her experiences have taught her how much we can lose when any of us is judged purely on physical attributes.

The following are brief parts from her speech. I used these particular parts because the spoke of her true experiences in South Africa, the stories she heard from those who experience the hate personally, and how it can related to what is happening here in the United States today. Also, i wasn't sure if I could release her speech verbatim without her permission.

I will my presentation with the TRC because for me, this is moment that change began to happen in South Africa. The Truth and Reconciliation Commission (TRC) was a court-like body assembled in South Africa after the end of Apartheid. Anybody who felt they had been a victim of the violence caused by apartheid could come forward and be heard at the TRC. Perpetrators of violence could also give testimony and request amnesty from prosecution.

My father was made chairman of this organization and I was involved with him while living in Capetown. While preparing for the TRC, my father invited many people from many countries to talk about what this organization should look like.

The whites in South Africa wanted to walk into these meetings and be ready to wipe the slate clean from all that happened during apartheid and walk into the new South Africa, but the Africans said "no." they wanted the types of human acts of violence they had seen, the rapes, the tortures, the massacres to be addressed. They wanted the people involved in these crimes to be put on trial for their crimes, these abuses, and be punished. This placed the TRC in a compromising position.

Out of this, three things were suppose to happen:

1. to hear the stories of the victims and survivors

2. to hear the amnesty applications from the perpetrators of those crimes

3. to come up with a formula for those who were victims and survivors

The worse part was hearing the stories of the victims and to learn about their suffering that will be forever a part of their lives. These stories would be something that they would never forget, loved ones they would never see again, hate they may never be able to release.

And then on the other hand, there were the stories from the perpetrators. just sitting there listening to their stories and trying to understand as a human, how they could have done what they did and then return home at the end of the to their families to show love, kindness, and understanding. What type of human being is this?

Some of these people that came forward were husbands, lovers, and church goers. But most important things about these stories it was to hear how they could have done these horrific acts, how far they had come as humans to be dehumanized to the other humans around them. When they told their stories you started asking yourself, "Who sits around and thinks up these things? Who thought that it was okay to take another person and spin them violently around a room until they are bleeding not just from their nose, but from their ears and then to top it off, make them lick up the blood?" What has gone on in that person's humanity that they can look at another human being and not see a human being!

In order to qualify for amnesty you had to tell the truth.

There was one story I heard from a mother regarding her son. In the morning she said good-bye to him, sending him off to school while she went to work. He was thirteen. At the end of the day, she returned home, turned on the television and saw her son's body as one of the many that had been tied to the back of a car and drugged to death. Seeing him in a pile of bodies on the side of the road after it had also been set on fire was such a powerful emotion for her that all she could in that moment was nothing. No telephone call just that image on a television screen while those who did this heinous act stood around proudly admiring what they had done.

One of the men involved in this crime came up for amnesty, but before he could receive it, he had to tell the truth, so he asked for all the mothers whose sons were involved in that killing to come so he could speak to tell the truth and ask for their forgiveness. As he told his story, the emotions he experienced since that time starting coming out. As that one mother sat and listened to his story she did one thing that shock him, she asked him to come to her and she kissed his forehead like she would have her son and then called him, 'her son.'

The emotion I felt after hearing this story brought me to tears. I have two sons. I sat and wondered how I would feel if I saw their bodies lying lifeless on the side of the road. Just thinking about it made it hard to breathe at that moment. It was a feeling I never want to experience again.

Naomi shared some other stories, but I believe this story was one that seem to effect the audience the most. Take a second and image how you would have felt. And then would you have had the courage to forgive him when he asked for it.

She continued to talk about the many stories, good and bad, that occurred during apartheid. She spoke of her father's involvement, the freeing of Nelson Mandela and the changes that happened and are still happening there today.

Whether in personal life or in the larger society, we have wounds that block our ability to be the wonderful gifts that we are meant to be in the world. We too have inflicted wounds unto others, bu all those would can be healed. However, it take courage and the willingness to speak and hear the truth. That first step to healing is so often the hardest. It all begins with the truth. When we tell the truth, healing can begin.

Here in the United States, since the election of President Trump, many things are starting to happen that could be the beginning of what occurred in South Africa. The police attacks on Black Americans, the hate crimes against the Jews, the separation of the classes (male and female), and the order that is stopping a place that was once a welcoming home for all to now become a home for the select. But no matter what is happening and who is in charge, we are all humans and are responsible for one another no matter the appearance on the outside.

The Women's March reminded me of the times in South Africa when brave individuals would get together and protest what was happening. My daughter and her friends took part in the March. I remembered asking if they had the usual items for a march, pepper spray, mask, etc. I wanted to make sure they would be protected if something happened.

After her speech, the audience was given a chance to ask questions. A few questions were asked, but the one that seem to drive home the point of what Naomi was saying during her speech was this: "How do we as parents and teachers teach out children how to make the difference that is needed during this time of discrimination?"

Naomi responded in a way I though was wonderful. She began by saying that if she knew the exact answer to that question, she would have a Nobel Peace Prize. "It is our responsibility to begin by telling the truth. Children do not see difference like adults. They do not like someone based on the difference of color or ethnicity but because they may be wearing a different color dress than theirs, or because they can run faster or have a toy they don't have. A good example is one time when I had shaved all my hear off. I was on a flight and a little boy and his parents walked past me. The little boy pointed at me and asked his mother why I did not have any hair. Instead of the parents addressing his question, they apologized to me and pushed him along. I stopped them, looked at the little boy and said, 'the reason why I shaved my head is because I am to lazy to comb it.' His face lit up and he replied, 'is that an option!' Just that one moment made such a big difference. He saw that I was different because my head was shaved, not because I was black."

I agree, it all begins with telling the truth. Instead of ignoring the question or situation, we should face it and address it. There will always be differences and there will always be two types of people involved in those difference, those who want to face and address it, and those who want to ignore it and hope it will solve itself. But out of those two groups, the group who wish to face and address it must do so in a way that is not from hate and violence, but from love and understanding. We all have to tell the truth in order to make any changes.

The challenges of growing up black and female in apartheid South Africa have been the foundation of my life. Those experiences taught me that our whole human family loses when we accept situations of oppression, and how the teaching and preaching of hate and division injure us all.

In addition to speaking and preaching, Naomi has established Nozizwe Consulting. Nozizwe means "Mother of Many Lands," in her mother tongue Xhosa and is the name she was given by her maternal grandmother. The guiding principle of Nozizwe Consulting is to bring different groups together to learn from and celebrate their differences and acknowledge their shared humanity. As part of this work, she has led Truth and Reconciliation Workshops for groups dealing with different types of conflict. She has also offered educational and partnership trips to South Africa for high schools, churches, hospices, K-12 teachers, and women's associations. These trips emphasize the opportunities to share our stories and experiences.

Ms. Tutu is the recipient of four honorary doctorates from universities and colleges in the United States and Nigeria. She is pursuing a Master's Degree in Divinity at Vanderbilt University. She is a single mother of two daughters and a son.

I was very happy that I had the opportunity to see and hear the passion Naomi has regarding being an activist for humanity. I cannot begin to express the emotions I felt during this speech and it made me happy knowing that what I am pursuing in my life through my writings, the meetings I attend, the events I attend, and the people I have befriended are all part of God's magnificent plan for me!